“I’m torn between feeling adventurous & responsible…”

dear apricot,

I really, really, really want to go on a holiday. I know exactly where I want to go – Bali (Indonesia) and I know exactly how much it will cost. (Under 3k for airfares and a week in a private villa with our own pool!). However, any time I even THINK about organising it, I get an attack of the guilts. I feel like I should be saving my money in this shitty economy, in case I lose my job or something terrible happens. I’m also about to upgrade to a newer car and I feel like I should be channeling all my spare cash into that so I don’t have to take as big a loan.

On the other hand, I haven’t had a proper holiday in 3 years! I’m so torn right now – feeling adventurous on one hand, but then feeling like  responsible financial gal on the other.

What would you do? Throw caution to the wind? Or be “responsible”?

— Jessica, from Curious Living.

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Hi Jessica,

Since you asked what I would do: If it were me, & I had this strong desire to go on vacation, I think I would go. But only if I knew I had the money. (You mentioned throwing caution to the wind, vs. being responsible, & I like to you think that you can do a bit of both if you’re smart!) If I knew that I had bills to pay & financial commitments to fulfill, I would definitely wait. I would make sure I had a decent amount of money saved up that would leave me feeling worry-free, & then I would take it from there.

The first thing I read in your letter was that you’re feeling terribly guilty about even wanting to go on vacation. I can completely understand why you would feel this way — being that there are people right now who can barely hold onto their homes, let alone travel to see their families — & you are so noble to have these feelings. But if YOU have a desire to travel, & you’ve been blessed with the means to do so, then I say go for it! To stop yourself from having a great life because of this rotten economy would be silly! You only live once, & I think you should take full advantage of taking a holiday….. But only if you can afford it.

You mentioned that you’re about to purchase a new car, & that is a huge step in financial responsibility. Now, I’m not saying that it has to be the car or the holiday, but I definitely think you should weigh your options & be smart about your choices. Ultimately, I cannot guide you in your financial decisions, because only you know your bank account. But what I can tell you is that you should not feel guilty in the least for wanting to go on a trip. From what I know about you, traveling is your passion, & anything that tries to put guilty thoughts in your head is silly. Always follow your heart; don’t listen to your head, which is really just your ego talking, anyway.

Another option you have is going on a smaller holiday. Instead of going to a different country, you could always go a few towns over. Take a roadtrip! Go on an adventure with a loved one. Visit a friend you haven’t seen a long time. It may not be Bali, but you could definitely make it a unique getaway if you wanted.

Let me know what you decide to do! I know whichever decision you make will be a good one.

— apricot.

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